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Casinos to Franchise the Police

Police Cashing in their Chiips

Police Cashing in thier Chiips

Unable to prevent illegal activities in certain sites, Thai police are to harness the power of crime to provide much needed and improved police stations.

After a string of failed attempts to raid notorious casino venues in Bangkok, The Metropolitan police have adopted a policy of “Don’t beat ’em, join ’em” by installing police sub-stations in the casinos, en-suite.

The force’s spokesthing, Police Field-Marshal Bakkanda, told us “It’s dangerous for police to venture into certain areas of the city, so it makes sense to have crimes committed inside police stations where we can monitor them safely. This way the gamblers won’t have to post look-outs to see us coming and we get to split the air-conditioning bill. It’s not often you get a win-win situation involving a casino.”

The pilot program involving casinos will, if successful, be expanded to include opium dens, language schools and fake-merchandise warehouses.

Dustin von O’Reilly, chairman of the FDCThai – the Foreign Drinkers’ Club of Thailand – responded with an official statement: “Anything that keeps the police off the streets is fine with us.”